Baked Goods and Wayward Brothers
by Smoochynose
Summary: Loki must be reclaimed from the dark side, Thor and Natasha bake cakes, and Tony is challenged by a fork. Asexual Awareness Week fic.


A/N: Another Asexual Awareness Week story. I was only supposed to write one and this is the third spewed out in as many days.

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 **Baked Goods and Wayward Brothers**

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"What the hell?" asked Tony.

"The fuck is going on?" blinked Clint.

"How did you even do this in an hour?" wondered Steve.

Most people say "I'm home!" when they get in, however most people aren't the Avengers. And most days half the team don't walk in on Thor and Natasha and a room covered in cakes, with Bruce quietly sitting in the corner nibbling away at a bright green cupcake.

"My friends!" Thor exclaimed, turning towards them and revealing the frilly pink apron he was wearing. "Is today not a truly marvellous day? A marvellous week! You midgardians never cease to amaze me."

The newcomers turned to Bruce for translation.

Bruce shrugged. "I've just got here too. You're better off asking Natasha."

"Nat?" asked Clint.

"Ace week."

For a second Clint looked puzzled before realisation dawned on his face. "Oh."

"Still not getting it here," grumbled Tony. Being a genius it tended to aggravate him when he was slower to get to the conclusion than others.

"Asexual awareness week."

"I don't get the cakes," mumbled Steve. "Is this another future thing?"

"It's not," admitted Tony, which was about as close to admitting he didn't know something as he'd ever come before.

"Cake is better than sex," Natasha said blandly, shaking edible glitter over a batch of cakes.

"Not really," Tony retorted quickly, reaching for one of the cakes and having to dodge the fork Natasha threw at him. Steve wondered which of these things was the reason for the projectile and decided against reaching for a cake himself.

"It's something the Ace community says, since we'd rather eat cake than have sex."

"Isn't it wonderful," Thor beamed, ignoring the way Tony was examining the way the fork was buried an inch deep in the counter. "You midgardians have a whole week in which you share love and support for _Aces_." The last word was stressed slightly and Thor looked to Natasha to see if he had used it correctly, grin widening at her slight nod.

"That's great," Steve said awkwardly, glancing around at the hundreds of cakes, pausing to scowl briefly at the way Tony was trying to the form from the table. "It still doesn't explain the cakes."

"I will use Ace Week to convert Loki from the side of evil forces!"

Nobody mentioned that Loki's evil forces was mostly harmless pranks these days and that he supported the Avengers more often than not. Nobody wanted to step into the mess that was the Odinsons' relationship.

"With cake?"

"The more cakes I make the more Loki will see how I care about him and that he should return home."

"You're going to take all these cakes to whatever secret lair Loki has made this time?" Tony questioned still tugging at the fork, having seemed to have taken it as a personal challenge. "Because if it's anything like the funhouse one those cakes will never make it two steps past the front door."

"Of course not. That is why Loki is coming here."

"What?" Clint stared at Thor in disbelief. You invited Loki here?" While he didn't hold too many hard feelings about the whole mind control incident, inviting an official enemy of the Avengers (Fury drew up a list for them after drunken barbeque with Deadpool) wasn't really the done thing.

"He should be here any minute."

As if he'd been waiting for the right moment to make a dramatic entrance, which wasn't too far from the realm of possibilities, the door slammed open an Loki strode in.

The sudden slamming of the door gave Tony enough of a start that he was able to pull the fork from the table. Unfortunately he didn't have the best grip and it went flying at Loki, leaving a narrow cut along the side of his cheek.

"I must say if you called me here to kill me, Thor, then you could have chosen a more effective weapon."

"I would not do such a thing," Thor denied. "You are here so I can show my love and support of your asexuality," he added waving at hand at the hundreds of cakes.

For a moment Loki looked teenage boy whose mother had just given him a kiss in front of the whole school. Thor looked at his brother hopefully.

"I don't have time for this level of idiocy. I have things to do," Loki eventually said, disappearing in a poof of green smoke but not before the Avengers saw the slight blush on his face.

Thor wasn't sure whether that reaction counted as a win or not. However by dinner all the cakes had mysteriously vanished from the kitchen so he decided it must be. Every batch he made for the following week also disappeared. He made sure every Avenger knew of the progress he had made with Loki with his excited babbling.

The other Avengers were more concerned about what 'things' Loki had to do, especially since things had been all quiet on the Loki front for a while now.

The cakes made a sudden reappearance at the end of the week when downtown New York suddenly started raining baked goods.


End file.
